Forget The Box of Chocolates

Prepare yourself.  I've got me some right powerful feelings tonight.  

Might be best to just move on, come back when I'm feeling more balanced.  

Don't say I didn't warn you.

Good 'ole Forrest.  "Life is a box of chocolates" and all that.  Ticks me off.  Not the movie, although I do have to say that I don't love Forrest Gump.  Really, the shrimp part is my favorite.  But no, the whole "You never know what you're going to get" line.  That irritates me tonight.  

Tonight, I just want to smack him.
I realize he (the character) is basically mentally disabled and that makes me a terrible person.
I wouldn't actually smack him, if that makes it any better.
I doubt that it does, though.

First off, it doesn't help that I gave up sweets for Lent.  Yes, I know I said I was giving up "seconds" but I also said that I knew what I meant, and then I discovered that the line was quite blurry, and I had no idea what I meant.  So then I thought I needed something with hard and fast rules.  And then I thought I was being legalistic, which isn't cool anymore, since the whole grace thing entered the picture.  But then I consoled myself with the fact that Lent is about where we were before Christ, which is stuck in legalism, or "rule-following", and so perhaps it was fitting.

Whew.  April 8th, I'm eating sweets morning, noon, and night.  And then I'm buying 1/2 off candy for the next week.  Or two.  Just in case you wondered about my plans.

Anyhow, that's the first reason why I hate the "chocolates" line.  The second is that I hate not knowing what I'm going to get.  Skeeves me right out.  I like predictability, dependability, schedules.  This Fire Life that this here FireWife is living, it has no schedule.  Nothing is set, nothing is dependable, except that anything can always happen.

People sometimes ask about our schedule.  Well, It's this:

Every third day, and every sixth day (but not on the every third), and classes on alternating M/F and W's.  But Sundays are off, at least 5/6.  Except not anymore, because we've switched again, and the Sundays (that used to be Tuesdays) are now going to be a different day.  Oh, and if there's a sporting event, you'll have to sign up for that, which doesn't start until two but if it goes into extra innings, you'll be expected to stay.  Oh, and don't forget about meetings, training, IST, and volunteer calls.

Bleh.

We're adding Paramedic class to the mix come Summer.  That'll be another alternating "every 3rd" except Sundays thing.  With a random 3-day-er here and there.  Just so you don't get too comfortable.

I love what my husband does for a living.  It's exciting, it's impressive, it's studly.  You can't deny that.  He's providing a valuable service to our community.  He's rescuing people, saving lives, and yes, he has climbed a ladder for a cat.  I'm so proud of him.  And most of the time, it jives well with our respective personalities (me, with a high need for alone time, and him, with a high need for not-being-alone).  Its just when it gets all shaken up, like it did tonight, that it feels all chaotic again.  

Like when you're on a large boat in the ocean.  Mostly, its a little bumpy but you don't really notice.  And then a storm sweeps in and you realize how much that boat can really wobble (baby wobble baby wobble baby).  Not that I've been on a large boat in the ocean in the last 20 years, but still.  I think it's like that.

Just for the record, I like a nice box of chocolate covered strawberries, or caramels.  Toffee even.  Just not the mystery creams.  Don't do that.  Don't get me those.  I will smack you.  Literally or figuratively, depending on when the last schedule change was, and how close you are to me when I accidentally bite into a coconut cream that I thought was chocolate ganache..

Feeling tossed about,

TFW