I haven't been breathing much lately.
This is what I discovered the other night when I finally let my breath out. It was as though I'd been holding it in for some time, and didn't even know that I was depriving myself of some really good oxygen.
See, there have been a few more stressors than normal in my life, and I don't handle stress. You might think, "Hey, Mariah, you forgot the 'well', you know? As in, you don't handle stress well." Nope. Not a mis-type, although you all know I'm prone to such things. No, I don't handle stress at all. I just refuse to acknowledge it. Ignore it's very existence. Do everything in my power to pretend it away. La-dee-la-dah-dee, no stress here.
And, uhm, yeah. That doesn't really work. It often ends with, as I said, me holding my breath (literally and figuratively), clenching my teeth more (weird habit of mine when concentrating under stress), and, in extreme cases, crying profusely.
Even though I don't like to give it any cred, if there are stressors happening, then there is stress happening. So that test I didn't prepare for, the two extra bills that I didn't anticipate, and a backed up washing machine, well, they do add stress to my life whether I acknowledge it or not.
The good news: I'm breathing again.
