Bird Cake/Bird Brain

Hey kids.  

Baking in progress

How you doing?

Nah, How Yoo Doin??

I hope you're doing well.  I'm pretty sure I'm doing well, but I'm in the middle of a sugar coma right now, and there's not much that I'm certain of at this point.  Example: I spelled "of" wrong, three different ways. You might not think it possible, but I found a way.  It's my own fault.  Since breaking the sweets fast at 1AM on Easter Sunday with a slice (or two) of Grapefruit Cheesecake, I've had

• 2 more slices of cheesecake
• 1 doughnut
• 2 1/2 cinnamon rolls
• 1 jelly bean
• 2 York Peppermint patties
• 1 heaping helping of chocolate cake
• thin mint icecream
• 2 chocolate bars
• 8 left-in-the-freezer-for-a-month chewy chocolate meringues

And that was just  yesterday.  I'm eating carrots right now, trying to find some sort of balance.  It's not working.  

Today, I bring you the Bird Cake (adapted from blissfully domestic), of which I've had a few nibbles, on top of my morning cinnamon roll and smoothie.  

I'm going to try and do a food-bloggy thing, where you get some pictures, and a nice recipe to follow at the bottom.   I don't know if it will work, I'm not really sure of what I'm doing.  But by golly, it's Cake Week, and I'm going to give it my best shot!

The Players:

Laying everything out, measured and ready, is called Mis en Place.
The pro's do it, because they're cool like that.
I do it so I only have to think at the beginning of the recipe.

Best Left to Professionals

I had an idea today, during class.  I was stahving dahling, in the purely first-world sense (more on that little phrase later) when I remembered my old go-to quick meal: Pizza Rolls, pepperoni style.

And then I thought, "I have eggroll wrappers, I can buy pepperoni, I have motzarella... I could do this!"  So when I got home, I tried it.

The prep work seemed right.
The smell was good.

But I've come to realize, there's a reason some people are paid to do things.
Those people are professionals, and some things are best left to them.
Among those things, apparently, are Pizza Rolls.

In other news, I re-released my inner blind 5-year-old.  With better results this time.

Made out of old wallpaper samples

Kitchen Fail # 1 & Giveaway

HA!  I just read the title of this post, and it sounds like I'm giving away my Kitchen Fail.

Doesn't that just entice the heck out of ya'?

But first, the KFail itself.

I started out innocently enough; I want to be a baker.  I like to be creative.  I want to create a yummy baked good.  Not a bad start.  

And then it became even more promising, as I drove past a Strawberry stand on the side of the road, realized I had cash money in my pocket, and came home with these:

And maybe this was heaping full as of yesterday at 6PM
And maybe there was another 1/2 of one also full yesterday that is now empty.
And no, I don't have an impulse control problem with regards to Strawberries.
Who's asking?

So that was a real boon.  And then, at the store, this guy was on sale:

Behold, the stars have aligned, the time for my creativity has arrived.

And let me tell you, I had big aspirations.  As I'm warming and mixing and rolling and pouring, I'm also thinking to myself, 

"Self, maybe this Strawberry Cheesecake Tartlet will become an Easter tradition.  Maybe people will beat down the door of your shop one day, exclaiming that they can't have easter without it.  Maybe you'll call them 'Easter Tarts'.  This has so much promise.  Nice thinking, self!"

Oh, how young I was then.  How naive...